The longest time.

     The moment I heard it, and I was in love with this stuff. As I describe it, beautiful seems a fake word. Drifting somewhere far beyond consciousness, the world looks perfect; and nothingness preoccupies me. Life is wonderful, no doubt. 

I don't care what consequence it brings

I have been a fool for lesser things

I want you so bad

I think you ought to know that

I intend to hold you for

The longest time.

   -Billy Joel

For love..

   Not a job. It's just a passion; a sudden urge to express yourself. Not a responsibility. Just a though; waiting to be put down, like many others. Not a commitment. It's just a feeling, overwhelming at times. Writing.
   Thoughts are mere shout outs of your mind unless they're written down. Ideas aren't concrete until they're put out and opinions don't matter until they're stated. Have a dream? Write it down. A materialistic reminder is much better than a mere thought that preoccupies you. One day, when you will be at the top of the hill, dreams made reality and standing by the flag of your victory, those words you wrote down will remind you of who you are, where you started from and everything beyond.
     It might look like abstract ideas expressed in queer gibberish, but these are the purest thoughts put down in a jargon everyone is familiar with. It's an art, acquired with time and persistence. Expressing yourself is the best thing you could, and you should do. You're here for a reason. Tell the ones around you what you think, how you feel and everything else they need to know. There's so much you have inside those abstract boundaries that is fighting to get out, that is yearning to be heard by someone. The one who understands. But at times you're alone. Or you need more than a physical reassurance, you need someone to understand, but there isn't anyone. Just let it flow through those words.
     I hate myself for not being so expressive, loyal and honest to myself. I know I never did justice to my passion, my ability to write. But I try. Believe me.

Failu(r)e.

   Words are like people. They come with all degrees of complications. With every extent of absurdness. They are deceiving. Beguiling. Swindling.

   Unfortunately, the bittern left my fate bitten today. Every time you fall though, you know where to step next time. I'll get my chances, hopefully. 

   Brevity, is the soul of wit. Aspiration, is the soul of life.

   

_

Kill. me.
  are thee only two words I could think of right now. Nothing else. Just nothing. Nothing.
There are days like these when I have sheer nothingness to deal with. When my mind is so numb I feel like a zombie reverted back to life. When time loses definition and defies every law henceforth.
 There are times like these when the only thing I can ponder about is what the hell am I doing here?! There should be something to do. Anything. But nothing seems to be the only possible answer.
Blehh...

When It rains green

   Among so many resons to love this particular day, these little drops of heaven sit at the top of my list. Never since I gained consciousness had there been a 14th of August when it didn't rain. Things might seem clearer and those frowns might turn into smiles; but no matter wherever you go you won't see it rain green. Never in a million eons.
    Me and rain have our own thing anyway. Endless smiles, countless memories, and 'pakoray', for sure. Ecstasy, might be the closest word for the feeling that arouses. But it's different when you have those green flags, adored with the crescent and the moon, fixed across every other rooftop you see. And with the clouds tearing hard, it feels perfect. Utopia.
   Frankly, I'm not a patriotic person. People might not even give a single thought when it comes to sacrificing their own lives for the betterment of their beloved country. But I will. But that doesn't, in any way, imply that i do not want this nation and my brothers to prosper and live a harmonious life. I sincerely do; and that is what motivates me to do something or anything that might bring us back from the depths of despair we're lingering in.
   On this day, all I wish is success and peace for this nation and my people. I hope future hold something wonderful for us. Till then, may this rain keeps soothing our faith, aspirations and dreams.
PAKISTAN ZINDABAD!

In the end.

Death. Don't know anything about it, but it still scares me like nothing else does. I try reallly hard, but sometimes I just can't get the idea of everything coming to an end, off my mind. And that's one of the reasons I try to make the most out of every moment I live. And all I can do is to hope, that the end will be great, satisfying & fulfilling. Because after all, you never know...

" When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done,
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.
Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty,
Keep me in your memory.
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest...
-Linkin Park

Distractions

  The van came to halt at the red light. My dad asked me to hand him his sunglasses, and I did. Putting them on, he pointed out to this homeless guy across the street. Ragged old man, holding a tin can and a stick in the other hand. And my dad said...
           "You know why I wear sunglasses all the time? So I don't have to look at the ugliness of life. You could even look straight in his face, pretending to be staring at nothingness; and he'll never know."
  That made me ponder over the fact how much things have changed over time. No doubt, we did advance in other fields and made things such things possible that are no different than miracles. But somewhere along the line, we lost our true spirits, that aspect of love and caring that our souls possessed. So much we have changed that we're not ourselves anymore. But why is it...
  Maybe it's because we have changed to become so obsessed, so self-centered and such egotistic beings that that we really don't pay attention to what is going on around us, or who is in need, or anything that pertains to anyone but ourselves. All those emotions, feelings and devotion for other beings are lost somewhere. Or maybe it's not what it seems...

  Maybe it's because over time, as things and circumstances got worse, our lives got difficult and uglier. And instead of endeavoring to resolve those issues, we just got used to of the things, making us numb day after day. And as the process proceeded, it changed us into these conscious beings, who may see, listen and feel what is happening to the world around them; but decide to just ignore it. Living their life on a lie, that things will be better again, soon, very soon. But never really ask this question: Who? Who is going to change everything? Who will pull us out of this abyss of despair and make our lives and thins world, a better place to live.

  Well..I'm positive about the fact that this world is not going to get changed if we keep on pleasing ourselves with all the wonderful things we have. I guess one day we will have to take off those sunglasses. The ones that make this world look nicer than it is. And take a look at the uglier and the darker side of this coin. After all, life is not about rainbows and ponies. Not really.